Must be a Reason Why I'm King of my Castle

That's the title of an annoyingly catchy old tune. It's stuck in my head, courtesy of one of my apparently smooth neighbours.
Unwritten rules of riding elevators, tongue in cheek ;)

• You always press the button more than once, even if it's lit and the lift is on its way.
• In case of over crowding, some smart arse has to make a beeping sound and pass a silly comment about his over weight friend.
• You always turn your back to the people and face the door. Then cast nervous glances behind your shoulder with your hands safely clutching your bags. Pretending like you're not worried about people looking at your backside.
• If you're a man standing closest to the door of a crowded lift, you better get out first. This may not be the best time to practice chivalry, at the expense of a bunch of people who can't wait to get out of a tiny, packed space.
• Always wait for the doors to shut before saying anything that may be misrepresented by those still in the elevator.
  

A couple, probably on one of their first few dates got on the lift in my building. There was a hint of nervous chemistry, easy to tell that they're into each other, but not comfortable enough to express their affection in public. They got off a few floors before me and as the doors shut, the guy said, "So, this is my little castle..."
"Strange," I thought, "Last time I checked, they were still called apartments."
So I looked up the meaning of the word castle: 1 a: a large fortified building or set of buildings b: a massive or imposing house 2: a retreat safe against intrusion or invasion

Maybe he wanted her to feel like a princess. Maybe he was just trying to be charming. His tone was apologetic though. Almost as if to say, "I hope you approve." Hmm.
We men tend to worry too much when a woman comes home. Almost expecting her to be critical. The main requirements, I feel, for any guy's castle, are cleanliness and neatness. Everything else adds on. It's difficult to maintain that code in a shared household and I'm learning to accept that not every man feels the same way. In my case, my bedroom is my castle. The lift is my drawbridge. The swimming pool, my tepid moat. It's funny how little humanity has changed in their psyche. Our homes are still safe retreats of privacy.
I guess the man in the lift was right about the castle bit.
I wonder what a prince would have said in the middle ages when a certain lady accompanied him back to his castle. "Welcome to my little cave?"