Stools. People who buy stools are not comfort-focused, they relish watching others squirm. I can never sit straight on backless chairs, my mind has to consciously tell my spine to straighten and then I end up looking stiff. A while back, I bought four, low, jute stools for my lounge. Round stools were hard to find, I had my eye on these multi-colored round cushions. If elephants wore slippers, there would be a stampede at this store!
Four square stools and multi-colored cushions (unfit for elephants), and 14 months later - a sudden paranoia gripped my usually furniture-confident nerves. What if someone with an over-sized tush sat on them? Forget the victim, I was more concerned about finding a matching stool!
Luckily, fate intervened and the stool broke under the stress of my perfectly-shaped tush. I was almost filled with a strange sense of relief, first that I was alone in the room. Second, thankful that it wasn't a round stool. You can imagine the consequences of having your butt stuck in a round stool. Almost as bad as the kid who got stuck in the toilet of an Indian Airlines flight a few months ago. My friend was part of the cabin crew on that flight and she thought it was hilarious! Poor kid. I hear he's got vacuum-suction phobia now.
Not knowing what to do with a broken stool and an extra cushion, I went back to the same store. It was raining. Not your normal rain either - the kind of rain that could spark a search for Noah's ark. I parked my car and after deftly clearing three six-foot puddles, a car drove past on the water-logged road and wiped the smug grin off my face.
I was the only person walking about, armed with determination and an umbrella. After haggling over the price of the stool, I decided to take a short cut back to the parking lot. Ended up walking through layers of muck, tried to clear a fence, ended up in more muck. I somehow made it back to the car in one piece and half the rain blew into my car in the three seconds it took me to get in.
All that work for one tiny stool! I'm hoping someone sits on it and breaks it again... the humor will be worth all the trouble ;)
